“What is Love?” Art Contest: Teen Dating Violence Awareness
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, we’d like to remind you that everyone deserves a safe and healthy relationship.
The Iowa Coalition Against Domestic Abuse will once again be hosting their annual What is Love? Art Contest, Feb. 1-20. The contest is open to Iowa youth ages 14-19 to submit an art piece that expresses what loves means to them through art, spoken word, music, and other creative forms. Visit www.icadv.org/what-is-love-contest.
February 10: Wear orange to show support for healthy relationships and survivors of abuse.
Each February, young adults and their loved ones nationwide raise awareness about teen dating violence through Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month (TDVAM). This annual, month-long effort focuses on advocacy and education to stop dating abuse before it starts. The theme for this year is “Real Love Respects.” Dating violence is more common than you may think, especially among teens and young adults. In fact, 1 in 3 U.S. teens will experience physical, sexual, or emotional abuse from someone they’re in a relationship with before becoming adults. And nearly half (43%) of U.S. college women report experiencing violent or abusive dating behaviors.
This year’s theme cuts through the noise by focusing on what real love should look and feel like. In a world full of mixed messages, this theme centers around one truth: respect is non-negotiable. It empowers youth to recognize harmful patterns early and to expect more from love. Because respect is everything, it’s earned, it’s honest, and it never makes you question your worth. Remember: If it’s real, it’s respectful.
Unhealthy relationships take many forms, and there is not one specific behavior that causes a relationship to be abusive. However, there are certain behaviors that should be cause for concern. Behaviors that should raise a red flag include: Excessive jealousy or insecurity; Invasions of your privacy; Unexpected bouts of anger or rage; Unusual moodiness; Pressuring a partner into unwanted sexual activity; Blaming you for problems in the relationship and not taking any responsibility for the same; Controlling tendencies; Explosive temper; Preventing you from going out with or talking to other people; Constantly monitoring your whereabouts and checking in to see what you are doing and who you are with; Falsely accusing you of things; Vandalizing or ruining your personal property; Taunting or bullying; or Threatening or causing physical violence.
If your partner frequently engages in these behaviors it may be wise to speak with someone with whom you feel comfortable. Adults who have experience with relationships may be able to provide advice that can help you to determine if you are in any danger.
If your partner exhibits any of the behaviors outlined above, or if your partner has physically harmed you in any way, there are many things you can do. Trust your gut – if you think you are in danger or in an unhealthy relationship, you should end it. If you are afraid of confronting your partner, or fearful of what they may say or do, there are numerous resources you can contact for help, guidance, or counseling. If you think you are in an abusive relationship, you should consider:
- Reaching out to a trusted friend, teacher, parent, or mentor;
- Spending more time with individual with whom you are comfortable;
- Getting involved with activities you enjoy that will allow you to associate with positive people;
- Seek the guidance of a school counselor or therapist; or
- Calling the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE (7233).
If you or someone you know has a question about a relationship, healthy or unhealthy, visit loveisrespect.org or text “loveis” to 22522.
Remember, love has many definitions, but abuse isn’t one of them.
To speak with a local advocate in northeast Iowa, call 800-383-2988.
